Understanding Amicable Divorce: What Makes a Divorce Amicable?

Divorce is often portrayed as a contentious and emotionally tumultuous process. However, in recent years, there has been a growing trend towards amicable divorces and couples parting ways with mutual respect and cooperation. But what steps need to be taken towards an amicable divorce? How do couples navigate this challenging period with grace and civility? In this article, we explore what makes a divorce amicable.

1. Seeking Legal Advice 

Engaging a divorce lawyer when contemplating divorce may be seen as counterintuitive to an amicable divorce. On the contrary, having a divorce lawyer guide and assist in the negotiations and/or mediation may better facilitate an amicable resolution. In cases where emotions are running high, having a lawyer, even a cheap lawyer, might help reduce tension as couples are not in direct communication with one another.  

The cost of hiring a lawyer may be a factor for consideration, particularly when parties are avoiding a protracted divorce. However, a lawyer even a cheap lawyer in Singapore, would be able to provide guidance on how to reach an amicable settlement while ensuring fairness and amicability. 

2. Effective Communication 

Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship, even when it’s coming to an end. In an amicable divorce, couples prioritize open, honest, and respectful communication. They listen to each other’s concerns, express their own needs and desires, and work together to find solutions that benefit both parties. If there are children involved, parties should focus on the needs of the children and what would be best for them. Effective communication can help minimize misunderstandings, reduce conflict, and foster a spirit of cooperation throughout the divorce process.

3. Willingness to Compromise

Divorce often involves dividing assets, making custody, care and control arrangements, and determining maintenance. In an amicable divorce, couples approach these negotiations with a willingness to compromise. They understand that reaching a fair and equitable agreement may require give and take on both sides. By being flexible and open-minded, couples can avoid protracted legal battles and find solutions that meet the needs of everyone involved.

4. Putting Children First

For couples with children, one of the most crucial aspects of an amicable divorce is prioritizing the well-being of their offspring. This means putting aside personal grievances and working together to create a co-parenting plan that serves the best interests of the children. Amicable co-parents communicate respectfully, support each other’s relationship with the children, and strive to maintain consistency and stability in their children’s lives despite the divorce.

In any legal proceeding where a child is involved, one of the most important considerations is the priority of the welfare of the child. According to section 3 of the Guardianship of Infants Act 1934, in any proceedings before any court where the issue relates to the custody or upbringing of an infant or the administration of any property belonging to or held in trust for an infant or the application of the income, the court must regard the infant’s welfare as the first and paramount consideration. 

5. Respecting Boundaries

In any relationship, respecting each other’s boundaries is essential in maintaining amicability and civility, divorces are no exception. It is important that couples give each other space and time to process their emotions and move forward with their lives. Also, it is essential that regardless of how the relationship ended, couples refrain from engaging in spiteful, vindictive, or manipulative behaviour. Instead, they should respect each other’s privacy, autonomy, and the right to make decisions that are in their own best interest.  

6. Seeking Mediation or Collaborative Divorce

For contested divorces, the law requires parties to undergo mediation to facilitate an amicable termination of the marriage, and litigation is the last resort for couples who are unable to settle at mediation. 

For simplified uncontested divorces, parties must first agree on all the issues relating to the divorce and the ancillary matters before filing the relevant documents to court. As such, parties must negotiate and discuss the issues to reach a mutually acceptable settlement before initiating divorce proceedings.

These alternatives to litigation empower couples to maintain control over the outcome of their divorce while promoting cooperation and compromise, resulting in an amicable and less painful divorce. 

7. Focusing on the Future

An amicable divorce is characterized by a forward-thinking mindset. Instead of dwelling on past grievances or assigning blame, couples focus on planning for the future, especially where there are children involved. They set goals, make practical arrangements, and envision a new life beyond the confines of their marriage. By looking ahead with optimism and resilience, couples can navigate the divorce process with grace and dignity.

Conclusion

In conclusion, while divorce is never easy, it is possible for couples to part ways amicably with the right approach. By prioritizing effective communication, willingness to compromise, putting children first, respecting boundaries, seeking alternative dispute resolutions, and focusing on the future, couples can dissolve their marriage with mutual respect and cooperation. An amicable divorce not only minimizes emotional stress and financial strain but also lays the foundation for a healthier and more positive post-divorce relationship.